Map of life expectancy at birth from Global Education Project.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Dear Intelligent Designer

It seems to me that for whatever reason, you don't get a lot of feedback. People just seem to accept things as they are, and even give thanks for it all, without letting you know what they like and don't like. I don't see why you wouldn't appreciate a little honest, constructive criticism.

Obviously, there's plenty of good stuff, that goes without saying. You know how it is, criticism always tends to focus on the negative because there's just more to say about it. So take it as stipulated that from my point of view, at least, it's good that there's something rather than nothing. Or at least I think so -- if there weren't anything, obviously I wouldn't be here to be disappointed so that gets a little tricky philosophically and all that. And if I weren't here, then there would be nothing as far as I'm concerned, except that I wouldn't be concerned -- well let's just leave it at that. Anyway, I'm here and so are the necessary conditions for that to be true, so you're certainly doing something right. And there is stuff for me to enjoy.

But . . . First of all, you're entitled to your own interests and foibles. I don't really get the thing about the beetles but I'm okay with it. There are a lot of little things that bother me, however, which don't really make any sense, e.g. poison ivy. What the heck is the point of that? Mosquitoes don't really seem necessary, either, or bedbugs. Lots of stuff like that which I just don't get.

But then there are more serious issues, where you really could have done a better job with the design. For example, the baby's head is too big for the birth canal. This causes no end of trouble. And the lower back -- the spine has a counterproductive curvature and it just doesn't hold up very well for a lot of people. Then there's the appendix - if it does any good at all, which I doubt, it's a lot more trouble than it's worth. Also, you didn't do a very good job separating the windpipe from the esophagus. People get food stuck in the bronchi all the time and like, die. Unless there's someone around to give them the Heimlich maneuver, which I have to point out was invented by Heimlich, not you. Even if you did invent Heimlich there's no particular reason why you couldn't have revealed the maneuver a few thousand years ago, along with the commandment to kill people who pick up sticks on the sabbath.

I could go on. There isn't enough room in lot's of people mouths for all their teeth. Osteoarthritis. Alzheimer's Disease. Childhood leukemia. All totally unnecessary and the result of basic design flaws. You're supposed to be omniscient as well as omnipotent, so it seems to me you could have done a much better job if you really cared. It's not too late to make a few fixes, you know? You might find yourself better appreciated.

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